Trying for a baby
Lots of testing?
Posted 03-25-15
Hi All! I'm new to the group, we are going to start trying for a second child soon, so I thought I'd see what everyone is up to..:)
The first time around, it happened right away for us, so I know that's out of the ordinary and maybe why I'm confused here....
I'm wondering why so many of the posts here are about all these tests... peeing on ovulation stick and pregnancy tests.. so many of them! Oh my goodness. I realize that there are a lot of folks on here having a hard time getting pregnant, I totally get why you're doing the ovulation tests. But is everyone who's using them having a hard time? Sorry I don't mean to be offensive to anyone, I'm just confused.
Maybe I'm being incredibly dense here... but isn't the general idea to keep a calendar and have sex every couple days in the middle of the month? Isn't that sort of tried and true? I get that some folks have irregular cycles and need the tests to try to figure out what's happening. Is there any disadvantage to just having sex every couple days... you'll catch the O no matter when it happens? Why do others use the tests? I guess I'm confused because sex a couple days before or after ovulation can result in pregnancy - so if you have sex every other day in the middle of your cycle (and your cycle is somewhat regular), aren't you bound to catch it??
I also don't get the pregnancy tests before a late period (again, I get it for gals with irregular cycles, you could be pregnant for a while before a period is truly missed)... isn't it sort of a waste of tests, and an emotional roller coaster? Most of the time another test has to be taken when AF is actually late I figured? I get that it's exciting and you want to know asap if you're pregnant... but if you get your period a couple days later when it was due... it was a waste?
Again, sorry I don't mean to offend. I'm just a bit confused by all the peeing on sticks.
The first time around, it happened right away for us, so I know that's out of the ordinary and maybe why I'm confused here....
I'm wondering why so many of the posts here are about all these tests... peeing on ovulation stick and pregnancy tests.. so many of them! Oh my goodness. I realize that there are a lot of folks on here having a hard time getting pregnant, I totally get why you're doing the ovulation tests. But is everyone who's using them having a hard time? Sorry I don't mean to be offensive to anyone, I'm just confused.
Maybe I'm being incredibly dense here... but isn't the general idea to keep a calendar and have sex every couple days in the middle of the month? Isn't that sort of tried and true? I get that some folks have irregular cycles and need the tests to try to figure out what's happening. Is there any disadvantage to just having sex every couple days... you'll catch the O no matter when it happens? Why do others use the tests? I guess I'm confused because sex a couple days before or after ovulation can result in pregnancy - so if you have sex every other day in the middle of your cycle (and your cycle is somewhat regular), aren't you bound to catch it??
I also don't get the pregnancy tests before a late period (again, I get it for gals with irregular cycles, you could be pregnant for a while before a period is truly missed)... isn't it sort of a waste of tests, and an emotional roller coaster? Most of the time another test has to be taken when AF is actually late I figured? I get that it's exciting and you want to know asap if you're pregnant... but if you get your period a couple days later when it was due... it was a waste?
Again, sorry I don't mean to offend. I'm just a bit confused by all the peeing on sticks.
18 comments
- Posted 03-25-15Welcome to the group, Loviee!
Well the thing is, the method you've described regarding keeping a calendar, doesn't work for a vast majority of women TTC. For some of us in here, it's very helpful to know when you're ovulating so you know where your fertile window is. Irrespective of having a hard time or not, many of us do this so that we have a better understanding of what's going on, on the inside. Even women with seemingly regular healthy cycles could have one or two cycles where they don't ovulate (hence the reason many of us chart our bbt and take note of our CM) so it''s more a matter of taking charge of your health and fertility. Additionally BD'ing at inopportune times could mean you miss your very short window entirely.
With testing, it can be difficult to wait especially if you've been trying for months or years (like myself and many of the other women in here). Some women are more prone to chemical pregnancies or miscarriages also, so early detection can be helpful in their cases.
Hope this clarified for you a little! 
Last edited 03-25-15Welcome to the group!
Charting helps to determinate if there is something wrong with your cycle, like a luteal phase defect that could need medical attention. It can also tell you why your period is late, if you did O or not, or if you are really pregnant. Starting to temp early in your TTC journey can help you determine if you are infertile earlier than you would by waiting a year before seeing a doctor.
Personally, I sometimes get a 45 days cycles so temping relaxes me. When we went to Europe last year, I didn't bring my thermometer with me and I was sure I O'd on the last day there since I had EWCM for a week. Turns out I didn't and O'd 2 weeks late and missed my chances that month since we didn't BD anywhere close to my real O date.
And for the testing before a missed period, most of us either use IC test or dollar store test, so there's not as much money that's wasted.
Posted 03-25-15Welcome! Agreed with above and thought I would add some.
An egg only survives 12-24 hrs, so timing really is key. For women who want to get pregnant, using an opk helps pinpoint when exactly to have sex so that the odds are in their favour. Also, it is rare to conceive after you ovulate because again, the egg only survives so long. You want the sperm to be ready and waiting for the drop. Some of us have partners with count and motility issues, so again, timing is key. We don't want to empty the gas tank sobtobspeak, but also want to make sure they have enough time to swim up. Some sperm get there in a few hours and others can take a day or longer. Some people's spouses work shift work and need to wake up to have sex with their partner, because again, timing is important.
I test early with pregnancy tests because of a medication I am on. I have suffered a loss at 15 weeks due to a med I wasn't aware was not TTC safe, so naturally, I have a fear of losing a potential child from meds. The sooner I know, the sooner I can go to my fertility clinic to look at different medication options.
I am in no way meaning this to be rude, but it seems as if you are naive about the struggles that couples can go through while TTC -which is a blessing!- but a lot of us really have struggled and we do our best to take charge and increase our chances of conceiving. Sometimes our bodies Ovulate a week earlier or later then typical, so we could miss the window all together. Opk's help. So can sex every other day from cd10-20.
Good luck trying for #2!Advertisement | page continues below- Posted 03-25-15Teff5 said:Welcome to the group!
Charting helps to determinate if th…Good points!
I buy ic's and got 60 hpt and 20 Lh strips for $37. - Last edited 03-25-15Welcome to the group! All valid questions, and I used to wonder the same thing when I first started this journey of ttc #3. My first 2 were conceived easily without OPK's and only one test needed to confirm on the day AF was due. However, here I am going into month 9 and will do WHATEVER it takes to help this process along.
Also, realistically, having sex every other day for months on end and even years as many of the ladies here have been here for a year +, just isn't feasible. At least for me anyway! 
Posted 03-25-15I'm glad you asked these questions because I think that education is important. You said that keeping a calendar so you can have intercourse in the middle of the month is tried and true but sadly it isn't for many women as mentioned above.
As for the peeing times for people this varies. For myself at least (I can only speak for myself) I POAS after 12 DPO. This is because the average time for implantation is 9DPO and my FS wants to know as soon as possible if and when I ever do get pregnant so I can start progesterone suppositories and go in for blood work. Others may have different reasons.
Posted 03-25-15Keep in mind too that some women have had miscarriages which takes a huge toll on your emotions. When you desperately want another baby ( or first baby) you will do anything to ensure the odds are in your favour. Testing is just a way to ensure you're ovulating and ensure you have sex at the right time. For me, I have a job and a toddler and other commitments and I'm tired so finding time to have sex every couple of days in general is difficult. I find I make the time when I know I'm ovulating. On top of that, when you've been trying for awhile and af shows up it is a huge disappointment so the cycle of doing everything you can starts again.
As for poas .. It's the excitement of the possibility of being pregnant.
Posted 03-25-15definatly not as easy as sex every couple days unfortunatly it's wayyyy harder, for ur sake I hope u don't have to learn all the crap we go through because it sucks sooo bad. Fertility is an amazing thing so many struggle to attain. I'd give anything to get pregnant fast your very blessed- loviee Original PosterPosted 03-25-15Ok thanks ladies. I didn't realize there were that many women having trouble conceiving in the group! Duh... I guess if you're in an online community talking about TTC, it's likely an issue, not a breeze.
For someone who had no issues to date, has only had 2 close friends with issues conceiving (one had miscarriages, another did IVF) and the rest reporting things happened pretty easily for them, I thought the majority of people didn't need these test kits, and that maybe it was some kind of trend. Sounds dumb now that I know a bit more, but hopefully you understand..:)
If nothing else, maybe my uneducated questions help you understand other people's perspectives. Your friends/family that say dumb things might not be rude, just not aware of your struggle! - Last edited 03-25-15loviee said:Ok thanks ladies. I didn't realize there were that many women hav…Sadly, most people having trouble won't mention it as it's seen as a bad thing. Actually, one in every six couples will not conceive within one year and one out of every twenty couples won't conceive within two years... That's actually more than people realize. Couples who had no trouble conceiving can have trouble conceiving later on as well... It's just like rolling a dice since you have one chances out of five every month (for fertile couples who timed sex well). If you have a five sides dice and you need to roll a five to get pregnant, it might still take a while to get the number five as it's random every time.
Even couples with no fertility issues can have trouble conceiving. My husband and I have both taken tests and everything seems to point that we are a fertile couple. DH as a count of 180 millions per ml which is above average, I have no thyroid issues, progesterone at 64 no iron defiency and so on. I had high levels of LH which is caused by my body not regulating to the birth control and according to my FS can give trouble but according to other FS, it has no impact... Two chemicals and one molar pregnancy, so we can conceive... I believe we are just very unlucky.
Track your pregnancy on our free #1 pregnancy & baby app
